I am very, very tired

[white_hart]

I am currently feeling exactly as exhausted as I did a few weeks ago, just before collapsing with what tests suggested wasn't actually covid.

I also have the same on and off headaches, brain fog and general malaise. Last lateral flow test was this morning, and was negative (though I have had more contact with people this week than I have done since pre-Omicron this week - half an hour or so unmasked at a coffee morning to remember the former colleague who was killed last week, an hour and a half unmasked in an in-person meeting yesterday, and someone I had a masked meeting with yesterday morning's spouse has just tested positive).

Do I have covid this time? Do I have something else? Am I actually just suffering from Proper Burnout and am back at collapse point after rallying briefly due to sick leave? (I have been managing to stick to 40-hour-ish weeks, though this is awful for my ability to actually keep on top of my inbox and probably doesn't really work well with my tendency to struggle to actually get down to anything major until all of my meetings are out of the way.)

Meanwhile I am stockpiling lateral flow tests in anticipation of the government deciding to stop providing them, and have been being vocal in meetings about thinking that it would be a jolly good idea if the university strongly encouraged people not to come to work with covid, or indeed any kind of infectious illnesses, even if self-isolation is no longer a legal requirement. (I got quite irate with the chair of the health measures advisory group who said we couldn't tell people they had to stay at home, and pointed out that actually, if we employ them, we bloody well can.)

I am working from home tomorrow, and find myself idly thinking that maybe if Storm Eunice knocks out our wifi so I can't make any of my meetings it would be quite nice, really.

Comments

[hilarita]

I think that it is incredibly fucking telling that I'm feeling rested and so on, precisely because I am on strike and can do a bit of thinking and a lot of sleeping in, and not careening from meeting to meeting.

Also, fire the chair of the health measures advisory group into space.

[white_hart]

It really points to why the strike is needed. (Oxford didn't meet the threshold, and I am not in UCU anyway, for various reasons including that I think my brain would actually explode if forced to deal with the conflicting pressures of you-must-go-to-work-unless-you-are-at-death's-door and the union telling me not to go to work.)

[nineveh_uk]

What on earth is such an idiot doing chairing such a group? Do they think that Michelin star restaurants should allow people who are running to the loo every 5 mins with norovirus to make their own decision as to whether to remain preparing food? Thank you for getting irate.

[nineveh_uk]

I am sorry that you are feeling really rough again. I hope you can get through tomorrow and have a quiet weekend.

[white_hart]

Thank you. I didn't manage to get much done today through the exhaustion and the splitting headache, but it is now the weekend and I can sleep lots.

[nineveh_uk]

I hope you sleep amazingly well tonight and tomorrow morning, and actually manage some enjoyment on Sunday.

[white_hart]

They are an academic, and therefore know a great deal about managing infectious diseases and fuck all about managing people.

[nineveh_uk]

Or the law, apparently.

[aurumcalendula]

ugh *virtual hug*

[white_hart]

Thank you!

[cmcmck]

Why is academe so full of idiots?

Hugs

[white_hart]

To be fair to the person, I think they're a world expert on managing infectious diseases, they just don't know much about managing people.

[rmc28]

Burnout may be what's going on.

Thanks for the reminder about LFTs (just ordered another box online).

[white_hart]

It wouldn't entirely surprise me.

[mrs_redboots]

I, too, have just ordered another box of tests! Sorry to hear you're feeling so rough; it does sound like burnout. Do you have a decent supervisor you can talk to about this?

[white_hart]

Alas, the problem with being in charge is that there isn't really anyone to help you deal with overwork!

[mrs_redboots]

Unless any of your juniors can take some of the more routine load off you? I know that delegating is really hard to do, but sometimes it has to be done.